Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Mourning Britt

A few weeks ago, our dear neighbors lost their 18 year old son, Britt as he went in for a biopsy on a brain tumor and never came out. I've never experienced heart break so intense. This isn't even my tragedy to bear but I feel so incredibly attached to it that I can't stop thinking about it. I worry about Britt's mom, a beautiful and strong woman who, at the same time, is vulnerable and fragile. Every time I think about her I worry. The only time I feel better is when I'm with her, talking to her, looking at her, seeing that she's breathing and surviving another day. I yearn for the many light hearted conversations I've had with her over everything from our children's constipation issues to the latest and greatest book to read. Will she ever be able to have those conversations again? What do I say to her day after day...or does she just need for people to stay away? It's terrible to feel someone's pain so intensely and yet be completely powerless to do anything about it. Today I got an e-mail from a friend that said I would be blessed to know that I am right where I need to be. Hmmmm. Where do I need to be right now? I guess all I can do is be a good mom. And hope I can do and say the right things to the people I love.